The 7 Secrets to Fitting Into British Culture
WITHOUT looking like an outsider
You CAN Do This. And I’m Here to Help
“The strangest country I ever visited was England; but I visited it at a very early age, and so became a little queer myself. England is extremely subtle; and about the best of it there is something almost secretive; it is an amateur even more than aristocratic in tradition; it is never official.”
G.K. Chesterton
Who Am I?
My name’s Pattie. I was born and raised in England and have stayed here ever since. I live in the countryside between Wales and the West Midlands and have a great love of hiking and wildlife watching. I also greatly enjoy reading and music. Festivals are basically my form of therapy!
How I got here
When I was 17 I started struggling with a number of anxiety disorders. One of the results of these disorders was that I became afraid to travel abroad. I was frightened to go on airplanes and scared to be in unfamiliar countries so far away from home. Especially if I was unsure of the culture and customs. Despite my fear, I still had the desire within me to discover and explore new places. So, I began to travel more in the UK. What I didn’t realise was that this was a blessing in disguise.
Over the last 10 years I have discovered so many wonderful things about the UK. I can’t believe I lived here for so long and never knew about them! I also can’t believe I was ever told that I HAD to go abroad if I wanted to go somewhere interesting or fun. I’m here to tell you that it’s simply not true, and give you 1001+ reasons to take a trip here.
However, I understand more than anyone how nerve-wracking it can be to feel like you’re going to visit somewhere and stick out like a sore thumb. So, I’ve put together this handy guide for you. There really is no need to feel nervous about visiting the UK, and with these tips you can feel completely confident when you take your trip here.
My Best 7 Tips
“Okay, now with that out of the way, I’m super excited to share the top 7 cultural secrets I have grown up with as a Brit. Let’s start with #1
Secret #1: Don’t Push In
The Brits are notorious for loving a queue. Or you may be more familiar with it being called standing in “line”. While this may seem trivial to you it’s actually pretty important to us Brits.
Why? It’s good manners. It’s a sign of respect for the people who are also waiting. It is a genuine social faux pas to push in line, so make sure to look for the queue and join the end of it so you can wait your turn.
While we’re at it, it’s a good idea, in general, to respect people’s personal space while in the UK. Getting too close to someone can come across as invasive or even aggressive. Be respectful and take a step back.
Whenever you’re going up to a counter, ticket office, or even onto a bus, take a quick glance around to see if a queue has formed and then promptly join the back.
Secret #2: Be Polite
One of the first things British children are asked while growing up is “What’s the magic word?” No, it’s not to find out whether they should be expecting a Hogwarts letter in the post. The magic word is “please”. You are then expected to use this word when asking for anything. Examples include: “Could I have the cod and chips, please?”, “Please could you tell me how to get to Big Ben.” or “Two pints, please.”
Thanking someone who gives you something, offers you something, or does something for you is very important too. It is another sign of appreciation and respect. Thanking your server for your change, thanking the bus driver, and thanking someone for moving out of your way are all great examples. And not just a throwaway “thanks”, but a “thank you” or a “thank you very much”, please!
Another surprising one is saying sorry. Brits say they’re sorry for everything but they’re not really apologising. It’s the equivalent of saying “pardon me”. So you may say sorry when moving through a crowd of people or getting someone’s attention.
Finally, always say “excuse me” if you need someone to move out of your way. Remember what I said about personal space in secret #1? This ensures you never have to barge past to get to where you need to be.
Have a practice. Next time you need to move through a crowd, try saying the most British expression in the language; “Sorry, excuse me, please. Thank you very much.”
Secret #3: Know Your Geography
When foreigners think of the UK they often think of England or, more specifically, London. However, there are 4 different countries that make up the UK – England, Wales, Scotland and Northern Ireland. Each has its own rich distinctive culture that should be respected.
Not only does each country have its own culture, but different towns and areas within those countries have their own cultures too. Many of these cities even have rivalries with each other, too. So, don’t assume everyone from up north is from Manchester, or you might have a very annoyed Liverpudlian on your hands.
One of my biggest tips is to NEVER make fun of anyone’s accent, no matter how strange it sounds to you. Accent is very much linked not only to location but to class and upbringing too. The accents you hear on the likes of Maggie Smith or Benedict Cumberbatch are mostly only found in posh circles from a certain location. So, if you tease someone for their accent, you may as well be mocking them for their lack of wealth or their background.
If in doubt, ask! Never assume you know someone’s culture, and be curious. People will love to prove to you that there’s more to the UK than London.
Secret #4: Don’t Take It Personally
If you end up spending any amount of time around Brits while you’re here, you will have the joy of experiencing “banter”. What’s banter? Well, it’s basically when your British friends will gently tease you as a sign of friendship.
Okay, as a Brit, even I know recognise that’s a little odd. To me, it’s a sign of reassurance – as if saying “It’s okay, we both like each other enough to tease each other and know we don’t really mean it.”
How do you tell if someone’s having banter or actually insulting you? Well, if a Brit is actually insulting you, then you will pretty clearly know about it. They will not be smiling or laughing. If they’re being friendly towards you generally, then you can bet it’s banter.
If someone’s banter makes you uncomfortable, let them know! You can just say “Sorry, I’m not quite used to British banter yet. Would you go a bit easy on me for a bit?” and they’ll stop as soon as they know you’re uncomfortable.
Secret #5: Learn The Lingo
While you may get a bit of funny look for calling trousers “pants”, Brits are generally exposed to American television enough to know what you mean. The problem comes when it’s the other way around.
A lot of lingo is cultural too. For instance when someone says “Alright?” to you, they’re usually just greeting you rather than asking if you’re alright. It’s the equivalent of “‘Sup?”
Try to brush up on the British lingo before you go to avoid embarrassing yourself. Here are a few to get you started:
- Lift -> Elevator
- Pavement -> Sidewalk
- Cuppa -> Cup of tea
- Fag -> Cigarette
- Pissed -> Drunk or Annoyed
- Mate -> Pal
- Can’t be arsed -> Can’t be bothered
- Mug -> Idiot
- Chippy -> Fish and Chip Shop
- Rubbish -> Trash
A lot of lingo and slang is linked to background and class, just like accent. So if you’re not sure what something means, just ask. They will be more than happy to fill you in!
Secret #6: Use Your Inside Voice
This one is pretty quick and simple. Many cultures use a louder voice when they speak than the UK does. However, it’s considered rude to talk too loudly in the UK. You will certainly make yourself stand out as the ignorant tourist as all heads turn to see where the loud voice is coming from.
There’s no need to whisper, but just try to dial the volume back a little until it matches everyone else’s. While this applies everywhere, it is especially important in inside spaces such as shops, restaurants and cafes. In fact, on the tube, many people stay completely silent.
If you’re unsure what volume you should be speaking at, take a moment to listen to the volume at which people around you are speaking – if at all! Then your voice can slot right in.
Secret #7: Don’t Dilly-Dally
I know I’ve tried to steer you towards an awareness that’s wider than London, this secret is pretty London-specific. While England’s capital has a lot of tourists, it is also full of workers and stressed businessmen going about their daily lives. So, it’s important not to get in anyone’s way or disrupt anyone’s journey.
There is an unspoken rule amongst Londoners that walkers should keep up a quick pace and should not stop in the middle of the walkway. This means if you do need to stop, you should quickly head over to somewhere that’s not in anyone’s way. For instance, in the tube station, this may mean heading over to stand against the wall instead of in the middle of the room.
One of the most common places people hold others up is at the ticket gates at tube and train stations. Make sure you have your ticket, card or pass ready in your hand before you reach the barrier.
You Can Do This
Now you’re one step closer to fitting in when you come to visit the UK!
I understand that visiting a new country can be really nerve-wracking, and I want to help you feel as comfortable as possible when you visit. So, if you have any more questions about visiting the UK or fitting into British culture, please click the button below and ask away. I’ll do my best to help you on your journey and tell you everything you need to know.
